This is the column that almost did not happen. Sometimes, it is as though there’s too much happening in life, and there’s no headspace for writing. This week, that is what happened for both Mapi and me, where we both found ourselves overwhelmed by the very things we write about each week in Live By […]
Our choices about how, where, and with whom to spend our elderliness are not always straightforward—economics and relationships impact decision-making. My friend Fifi is trying to identify a carer for her mum, who lives in a rural village. If she were to want to bring her mom to live with her in Johannesburg, currently, there
LIVE BY DESIGN | The good death debate: Retirement homes vs. family care Read More »
Horror movies are the most watched and most profitable genre. What allures us to watch disturbing movies? At least they are fiction, and in choosing to watch them, we think we are not harming anyone else. But what about when horrific videos circulate on social media that depict real life with real people? How do
LIVE BY DESIGN | The dark allure of the Zanzou videos – what are the ethical questions? Read More »
As planned months ago, Mapi and I set off on the last of my 70th year’s travel adventures – Vietnam. Her partner and child carer stepped up to make this possible so the reunion on Valentine’s Day would be extra special. We began our travels so light-heartedly. We welcomed this short break after an exceptionally
LIVE BY DESIGN | Two South Africans unpack democracy and privilege in Vietnam Read More »
There are countless jokes about the so-called “breadwinners” in our families—the aunties and uncles who hold the keys to the cooler fridge during family events or those commanding figures whose presence looms large in our lives. We often whisper about their exercise of power, aware that voicing our dissent too loudly could lead to dire
LIVE BY DESIGN | Balancing power and empathy: Trump-inspired leadership insights Read More »
How often do we see the signs “In Case of Emergency.” They are in the corridors in the workplace near the fire extinguishers. There is a notice in every lift we step into. There are the signs in the aeroplane indicating the seats with the emergency exits. But what about carrying “in case of emergency”
LIVE BY DESIGN | In case of Emergency – Let’s get practical Read More »
In these lines of poetry, “In Blackwater Woods,” Mary Oliver, winner of the Pulitzer Prize for poetry and Unitarian Universalist minister, captures the essence of collective mourning: “Look, the trees are turning their bodies into pillars of light, are giving off the rich fragrance of cinnamon and fulfilment… you must be able to do three
LIVE BY DESIGN | Collective grieving: What draws us to watching coverage of funerals? Read More »
This week, I am witness to a fallout between two friends whose relationship has spanned decades. They have shared their highs and lows, both personally and professionally. I had expected they would enjoy more time together in their elderliness. Indeed, it was not so many months ago that they discussed how their property investments and
It’s a dilemma that gnaws at the very core of our being: how do we reconcile love for family with the reality of their monstrous actions? How do we navigate the tightrope of loyalty and morality when those we care about have become entrenched in all that is wrong? During my holidays, my book-loving self
While driving and listening to the radio, I heard the guest make a statement that he believed to be powerfully true for himself: “Comparison is the thief of joy.” I found myself thinking about this statement long after the journey was over. This aphorism, “Comparison is the thief of joy,” is attributed to Theodore Roosevelt,
