Blog

It’s remarkable what confidences people choose to talk about to their hairdressers. I wonder what conversations you’ve overheard. It’s hardly a private and confidential setting. There is the sporadic sound of running water as assistants wash hair and the whirr of the hairdryer as the stylist does a blow dry. For conversations to happen, the […]

Caring for a terminally ill loved one is not easy, but it’s a privilege to be able to do so.” Rosalynn Carter, former First Lady of the United States and caregiver to her husband during his battle with cancer. She made this statement at the Annual National Conference of the American Foundation, where she shared

It is a shock the very first time you come across a dead body on the side of the street. As a journalist starting my career in 1998 in KwaZulu-Natal, I was exposed to the harsh realities of political killings and taxi wars.  It was also a brutal experience for me, at that same time

What can Dr Lucy Hone possibly mean by this concept of “active participant in my grief”? I’m used to people talking about grief as something that happens to you. We as humans have the capacity to love and the price we pay when we lose someone is grief. Quid pro quo. Chimamanda Ngozi Adiche commented,

A picture of Kairo Forbes flanked by her mother, DJ Zinhle, and her late father’s girlfriend, Nadia Nakai, popped up on my Instagram timeline this week. The photo posted by Nadia was snapped at an event celebrating her magazine cover shoot. Seeing these accomplished and strong women in Kairo’s life has been touching. Ever since

Klaas de Jonge has been on my mind since I attended his online farewell in early April. He plans to die on 5 May – the privilege of being Dutch and able to choose assisted dying in certain circumstances. The days progress. Of course, Klaas can change his mind – that’s a prerogative with assisted

There is a Zulu hymn that goes: “Zonk’ izono maziphele (Let all our sins be erased) Inhliziyo zibe ngcwele (And our hearts made Holy)  Yiza ungithethelele (Come and mediate for me)  O Nkosi yam’ (Oh my Lord)  It’s a chorus often sung on different occasions, whether by those seeking forgiveness or at Christian-officiated funerals, as

The last time I heard my mother’s voice was on 30 July 2004. Her harrowing howling sound pierced through the corridors of the hospital. Cancer had spread to other parts of her body resulting in multiple organ failure. On this day, I had made a special arrangement with the hospital to see her before I

Zoleka Mandela is planning her last days, accepting that cancer brings her passing closer – date uncertain. In 2012 she was diagnosed with breast cancer. In 2016 it resurfaced, and again her treatment was successful. This year, the third occurrence, her cancer metastasized, spreading to her spinal cord, hip area, liver and lungs and causing

I recently attended a funeral where mourners spoke in hush tones about the deceased’s end-of-life choices. The older sister commented that this was the first time in the family’s history that someone would be cremated, listing the entire generational lineage. Her displeasure wasn’t hard to miss as she delivered her brother’s eulogy. Noting the sister’s