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For the past 21 years, 24 February has been a day etched in my heart — a day dedicated to celebrating my mother’s birthday, honouring her memory, and connecting with her friends. It was a ritual of remembrance, a tradition of love that I held onto dearly. However, this year, something unexpected happened. For the […]

What rites of passage have you chosen to observe in your life? How might you do things differently if you could turn back the clock and make other decisions? At the end of last month, I turned 70. Questions arose – whether to celebrate or not to celebrate? Party? Dinner? Or to quietly enter the

Somewhere out there, a family is grieving the sudden and tragic loss of a loved one. From unexpected deaths like car accidents or violence to medical emergencies like heart attacks, every loss is unique and deeply painful. One family I know is mourning the passing of their 30-year-old daughter after she suffered from an epileptic

Have you ever “buried” a blood relative while they are still alive? Do you know of situations where the rift in the family is such that a son says to a father, “You are dead to me,” or vice versa? How do you support a person going through this grief and psychological loss of a

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WARNING: This article includes themes of suicide and physician-assisted suicide which may be triggering to some readers. Carol’s predicament A few days ago, 63-year-old Carol de Swardt travelled to Pegasus clinic in Switzerland for an assisted death. She requested 31st January as her day to die. She will first have been given an antiemetic to prevent

Forgiveness is essential to healing if we are to have peace in our hearts – that’s what’s on my mind this week. Ever the student, hungry for learning, I’m currently attending an online USA course, “Creating a Good Death” (CAGD). The focus of session three last Sunday, was forgiveness. It’s there on the teacher’s menu

This week, I was invited for supper by a journalist friend. “So, what’s our thinking on the elections and the new parties – what might be the outcome?” That was the substance of the first part of the evening. My friend explored thoughts on, “if the results might be contested, and if so, would the

My holidays began with the kind of drama that’s the outcome of being overtired. I’d had my last work meeting in the morning, arranged for the electrician to fix a problem, and spent the rest of the day in that frenzy of shopping for a self-drive, self-catering holiday. Readers know what that is like. Later,

I’ve been known to comment that living with a spouse who was on the apartheid assassination hit list had gifts to offer. My late husband (activist Joe Slovo) took a philosophical approach: “You must put in place guidelines for yourself (don’t take the same route home each day. Vary your schedule), and then you must